Most "other men/women" have no intentions other than sleeping with somebody who they find attractive.
However, not ALL "other men/women" are bad; some are truly caring people who have the intention of winning someone's heart. If you find yourself in this population, then this message is for you: Let go before it's too late.
Here's Where I Stand...
We can't control who we fall for --- and that may be one of the worst things about love. However, when it comes to falling for people who place you at #2 (or #3), then the problem becomes worse.
Let go! Why would you put yourself and your feelings out there to be somebody's #2? --- If you are satisfied with being someone else's #2, where do you place yourself in your own standards?
--- Let go: Stop stressing about someone who can't make up their own mind.
--- Let go: Stop letting yourself fall deeper for someone who doesn't see you the same.
--- Let go: Because if a person TRULY wants to be with you, then you would never have the title, "the other man/woman."
Point blank: You can NOT make somebody like/love/choose you.
Sometimes we get ourselves so wrapped up in our feelings and our hopes, that we forget the harsh reality of how things really are. It's better to fall back before your feelings get more involved and possibly, more hurt.
If it's meant to be --- it'll be.
Still...
Letting go is easier said than done. Holding on may actually work in your favor. Well --- maybe you'll just have a 50/50 chance: You'll either continue to get played, or he/she will finally come to his/her senses and choose you.
If a person TRULY wants to be with you, there shouldn't be any juggling between you and his/her relationship.
If you decide to stick with it --- the question becomes --- how long are you willing to hold on?
Where do you stand?
Messy
5 years ago
4 comments:
As a "good" FORMER other woman... I can attest to the fact that if the #1 commitment is solid and was made before God... you can pretty much cancel ever being chosen. No matter how much he says he cares, no matter how much his heart breaks when he sees YOU with SOMEONE ELSE... No matter the fact that he KNOWS you love him... in the end, he is going to pick her, because afterall... he'd rather break your heart before breaking hers... he still has to sleep next to her at night; and letting you go is simply the easier way out than choosing you and loving you. Besides, eventually you'll somewhat get over your broken heart and you'll realize that no matter how much you love(d) him... he may have ended up doing you the same way. The bottom line is- if your gut tells you to NOT get involved, don't... because like me, you probably know from jump how it's going to end... so don't even risk what could be (and was for me) a 95% magnificent ride until it ends (ended). The heart break in the end isn't worth it.
I agree.
And then you start to wonder about yourself, like its something wrong with you.
Its not you, its them.
I completely agree... when/if you find out your the "other" then you ought to respect yourself enough to get out of that relationship. Clearly the person you're with has no respect for his current relationship or you. Whatever excuses are being used they are worthless. Even if he/she were to leave the person they were with and be with you how could you trust them?
Great topic! And the only part that I have to disagree with is the "50 / 50 chance". Most people who have another man / woman have more than one other man / woman and usually have a reserve team too.... So don't hold on. YOU DON'T HAVE A CHANCE!!!
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