Readers Wanna Know: What do men REALLY want?

What's good everyone? Welcome to “Readers Wanna Know!”

In this series, I will comment on notes written from outside sources. Topics will and can be serious/funny/crazy azz hell. So yes, PLEASE email me your thoughts and ideas on situations/topics/videos/songs – whatever you’d like!

Topic: What do men REALLY want?

This entry's topic comes from T. Chilongo, a graduate student at Georgia State University.

Ms. Chilongo wrote an essay titled, “Minds of Men,” where she discusses how --- despite years of relationship experience --- women still can’t seem to understand what men want.

Before I let you know where I stand, I’ll let you read her note for yourself. After you finish reading, please answer the following question directly on the blog, this note/bulletin or through PM:

T. Chilongo writes:
Ok, so for those of yall who know me know that I love to write and that I use to be an avid blogger, so now after a hiatus, I'm back!!!!! The reason for this note is that after conversations with several of my wonderful girlfriends and my own life experiences, I have realized that I know very little bout relationships and even less about men, lol! After one of my best friends called to ask me for advice about a guy who she has been dating for a year and who doesnt want to committ nor does he know what he wants, I realized I had absolutely nothing to offer. I mean, personally, I am coming out of a 4 year relationship with a man who I thought was the one, but let's just say people grow up and grow apart, so now im back in this jungle thats known as the singles scene and I have absolutely no idea how this works.

After several convos wit the girls,I realize that none of us have any idea what we're doing, we're all in "situations" with guys that we care about and who supposedly care about us but are unwilling or incapable of commiting for various reason (i.e-ex hang ups, fear of commitment, or inability to be monogamous). So the question is what do we do as women? We are all beautiful, educated women with our stuff together who are looking for wonderful men who have something to offer and are not afraid to commit, but it seems as though men in their mid to late 20s arent looking for relationships; they want a woman/women at their disposal and are even willing to go above and beyond to make that woman feel special, but when feelings start coming into play all the sudden things get kind of complicated. They still want us to remain in their lives but yet they are unwillingly to give us what we want. So being soft, caring and females we tend to stick around and cater to their needs while at the same time we settle on our on needs.

So the purpose of this note is to get some male insight on what it is that guys want. So if you are a male, please leave any insight or advice that you have for us women who have no idea what goes through yalls mind lol. I look forward to reading y'alls advice!

Here’s Where I Stand…
It's so easy to generalize... "Women want," or "Men want," --- but people fail to realize that there will NEVER be a concensus on what we want. That's the problem. People are so caught up in these situations that they forget that everybody IS different, and that maybe a man/woman IS looking for a relationship -- but just wants to take it slow. I ... Read Moredon't think it's anything wrong with that.

Relationships are so overrated. The moment someone finds someone that they like; they're quick to jump in a relationship. --- Stop and take time; get to know someone. You can date someone for a YEAR and still not be in a relationship.

My point is: You will never know what MEN want --- but you may find out what I want, or another other guy who decides to post a response. We all want different things. People shouldn't let past experiences dictate how things are in general. So what if you dated 20 men and it all ended the same. There are millions more men out there that are totally different. Know that at OUR age (mid - late 20s); it IS important to take things slowly before rushing into a relationship --- and to be very patient if the other person can't come to terms with that title. It all starts with communication and understanding.

Where do YOU stand?